Nicole Kidman won’t have sex with Keith Urban
In an effort to do something that makes no sense whatsoever, Nicole Kidman has stopeed having sex with Keith Urban until after they get married.
Nicole Kidman has put a sex ban on her fiance Keith Urban.
The ‘Cold Mountain’ actress has told the country singer they won’t have sex again until their wedding night - which is rumoured to be taking place in a few weeks time.
A source told Britain’s Daily Sport newspaper said: “Going four weeks without sex will certainly increase the passion on their wedding night.”
Nicole reportedly got the sex ban idea from her friend Russell Crowe. The ‘Gladiator’ star went for months without sex before he married Danielle Spence in 2003.(source)
First of all, she probably did it out of sheer fright. Dude is seriously scary. Like, the spawn of Johnny Winter and Quick Draw McGraw, scary. Secondly, WTF? Why do women think that holding out on a guy is going to make it better? He’ll either a) masturbate three times a day to porn until then, so he’ll be burned out, bitter and not interested in her quaint “missionary” position. Instead he’ll want to go straight for some nice DP action avec accoutrements. Or b) he’ll be so pent up that he’ll bust a nut trying to get his shorts off at go-time. Either way, the wedding bliss will be…not so much.
On a separate note, Russell Crowe is about the last person I would take sex advice from. I also think cutting him off from sex is the best way to get a high speed phone to the face. If that’s what you were looking for.
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Posted in Current Affairs, Keith Urban, Nicole Kidman |
By Fatback
2 Comments to “Nicole Kidman won’t have sex with Keith Urban”
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June 3rd, 2006 at 6:30 am
I totally agree with you and don’t understand this new trend. I also think the whole holding-out thing might be a preview of things to come… no pun intended. I wouldn’t marry someone who could be around me for a month and NOT have sex with me. Sheesh!
June 3rd, 2006 at 2:02 pm
It’s not very fair to the stripper at the bachelor party, either. Her face is gonna look like Munch’s The Scream as painted by Jackson Pollack.